- Write only when you feel like it.
- Follow trends.
- and when one trend falls through, jump on another
- and another
- and another
- Move on to a new project before you’ve finished the current one.
- and then bail on that one, too.
- Eat garbage, never work out, or otherwise treat your body like shit
- Put writing at the bottom of your To Do list.
- And then ponder aloud why someone you don’t like got a book deal and you didn’t.
- Have no interests other than writing.
- Set unrealistic goals…
- …and punish yourself when you can’t meet them.
- Let the fact that you write young adult be an excuse for behaving like a teenager.
- A bratty teenager.
- Burn a bridge.
- or two.
- or ten.
- Lose your shit over negative feedback.
- Lose your shit over anything, really.
- Mistake a writers’ conference for a frat party.
- or a rave.
- or a brothel.
- Never finish anything.
- and then ponder aloud why that person you do not like got a second book deal.
- Submit before you’re ready.
- Self-publish just ’cause.
- Be a dick.
- Surround yourself with losers.
- and whiners.
- and procrastinators.
- and gossipmongers.
- and high-maintenance drama queens.
- Act like “commercial” is a four-letter word.
- and then ponder aloud why that person you don’t like makes more money than you do.
- Confuse the real with the fake.
- and then spend your free time talking about how you are just the realest motherfucker on planet Earth.
- and then email all your friends asking them to comment on the blog post in which you talk about how you are just the realest motherfucker on planet Earth.
- Write more than you read.
- Spend all your time on Twitter…
- or Facebook…
- or Pinterest…
- or Blogger…
- or Goodreads…
- or in the comments section of an article that condoned/condemned a hot-button issue in your genre…
…convinced it counts as “marketing”
- Gossip.
- Run spell-check and call it a revision.
- Plagiarize.
- Believe everything you hear.
25 Things Every Writer Should Do (to better understand why it's best to not do them)
6 responses to “25 Things Every Writer Should Do (to better understand why it's best to not do them)”
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LOL. I like these.
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AAAAAH I'm spending too much time on facebook these daysThis post is awesome
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LOVE this post!I've done almost everything on this post…
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Great post, and very funny, too! I have to admit that I did feel bitter when Snooki got not one but two book deals (even though she didn't actually write either book); on the other hand, I do like her because she's funny. I can't bring myself to read her books, though.
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These are great! Sadly, I spend a great deal of my time tweeting.
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These are great!!! Sadly, I spend a lot of my time tweeting.
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